The doctor took my hand, and she explained to me I was having this baby – soon. And babies don’t survive at 22 weeks.
Considered a low risk for going into preterm labour, I never received an internal cervix measurement with my first pregnancy. At my 20 week scan, I did receive an external length of my cervix, but it didn’t provide us with the information that could have prevented our loss.
On 22 March 2020, when I was 22 weeks pregnant, at 10 am I felt like there was a concrete bag on my stomach. I ignored the pain for a little bit. ‘Deal with it’ was the message I’d received from my midwife. It was normal. As the pain worsened, my partner Jordan, and I decided we should go to the hospital.
Once we got to the hospital, the pain was so bad I couldn’t walk. The Emergency department sent me straight up to the birthing suit. We didn’t have to wait too long before a midwife saw me for an assessment. As she pressed on my tummy, I started bleeding, and I knew something was wrong. They asked me for a urine sample. As I went to the toilet, I saw a lot of blood.
I remember screaming ‘NO, SHE’S TOO LITTLE’.
In another room, a doctor came in to examine my cervix. On examination, they found I was fully dilated, with bulging membranes and I had been through the first labour stage.
The doctor took my hand, and she explained to me I was having this baby – soon. And babies don’t survive at 22 weeks.
I held onto the hope if I could stay still and calm, I could get my baby girl to 23 weeks. On 23 March at 4:28 am, I gave birth to my sleeping angel.
I didn’t even get to hear my sweet baby girl cry.
Not a day goes by that I don’t think of my Lexie. I miss her so much!
When you have a stillbirth, you not only lose a child. You lose the years of watching them grow and seeing the person they become.
I am now pregnant again and have the support of a Maternal-Fetal Medical Clinic. Pregnancy after loss is so hard. Every pain and reduced movement causes me alarm. Each day is a struggle, worrying something is about to go wrong.
If only there were more awareness of incompetent cervix and preterm labour signs. My first pregnancy could have ended differently.
Help fund research, support families and save little lives
Did you find this helpful?
Good job! Please give your positive feedback
How could we improve this post? Please Help us.
