For my husband, Mark, and me, family is held not only in the moments we have shared, but in the love we continue to carry. Our daughter, Hope, was stillborn at 21 weeks after four rounds of IVF. She was our first pregnancy, cherished from the moment we knew she existed, and she remains our only child. A precious and enduring part of our family.
We had imagined all the small wonders of a life unfolding: Hope’s first smile, the sound of her laughter, the person she might become, and the happiness we longed to give her. Although she never took a breath, Hope changed our lives forever. She is loved every day, and the future we pictured for her now finds expression in the kindness, compassion and hope we offer to others.
Finding support after stillbirth
After Hope’s death, I searched for people who could understand the heartbreak of losing a baby.
Red Nose became a lifeline in one of the darkest seasons of my life, offering compassionate support without judgement. Being heard by people who understood helped me feel less alone and gave me a way to begin moving through grief. Not neatly or quickly, but gently, one day at a time.
Through it all, Mark has been my greatest source of strength. Together, we have continued through 11 IVF cycles, carrying the weight of what we have lost alongside the love that still holds us together. Our story does not follow a simple path from sorrow to healing. It is a story of learning that strength and softness can exist side by side, that grief deserves space, and that love can remain steadfast even when life cracks you open.
Honouring Hope in August
During August, I honoured Hope by taking part in Red Nose’s Ready Set Go. I walked 3km a day and fundraised in her memory. Every step carried my daughter’s name while helping Red Nose continue its grief and loss support, research and safe sleep education. I also donated copies of my book so other bereaved families could be reminded that they do not have to face the unimaginable alone.
Remembering Hope this Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month
This Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month is another important time for us to remember Hope, speak her name and open up conversations about pregnancy and infant loss, so families feel seen, supported and less alone.
To anyone living through similar pain
To anyone living through similar pain, I offer a simple truth: you are not alone. Grief does not need to be carried perfectly, quietly or without help. Your baby’s life mattered. They are loved, they are remembered, and so are you. Hope’s time with Mark and me was far too short, but her place in our family is everlasting. By speaking my daughter’s name and sharing our story, I keep that love present, and turn it into a source of connection for others.
About Lisa Mitchell
Lisa is an Australian author from Beaufort, Victoria.
A devoted wife, aunty, animal lover and creative at heart, she writes from lived experience about grief, love and resilience. Her book Hope Lives in Us can be found at Amazon.
About Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month is observed throughout October, with Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day held on 15 October. For bereaved parents and families, October is a deeply important time to recognise babies lost through miscarriage, stillbirth, neonatal death and other forms of pregnancy and infant loss.
If you need support, our 24/7 Grief and Loss Support Line is here for you on 1300 308 307. You can also explore our Stillbirth Parent Resources.
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