Our story of vanishing twin syndrome, uncertainty, support and the enduring love we carry for our baby Sunny.
A pregnancy held between love and loss
When we learned we were expecting twins, our pregnancy began with two little lives and so much hope. Then came the news that one of our babies had died through vanishing twin syndrome. We lovingly called that baby Sunny.
Grief arrived alongside my continuing pregnancy. It was difficult to mourn one baby while trying to celebrate the other, especially when every appointment carried uncertainty. We worried we might lose our surviving baby too. At times, stepping back from the pregnancy felt like the only way I could cope, but that distance brought guilt and fears about whether I would be able to connect with my baby.
Living with uncertainty
The months that followed were physically and emotionally demanding. Complications with our NIPT results placed our surviving baby at high risk for trisomy 18, and we chose to wait until birth rather than have an amniocentesis. At the same time, I was managing my own serious health concerns after a brain bleed. The pregnancy became a long period of waiting, worry and trying to protect a fragile sense of hope.
Preparing for our baby felt hard. Buying even the smallest things seemed too risky until late in the pregnancy, when our baby moved head down and hope began to feel a little safer.
Finding support in a difficult season
Support made space for feelings that were difficult to name. Through Red Nose Australia’s phone counselling, grief information and peer support, we found someone ready to listen without judgement. Even after I missed my first appointment, a counsellor gently helped me work through my thoughts and take the next step.
A joyful arrival, with Sunny always in our hearts
In time, we welcomed a beautiful, healthy baby boy. My baby and I came through the pregnancy safely, and today he is deeply loved.
Our happiness does not erase Sunny’s place in our family. By sharing our story, we hope other parents living through early pregnancy loss will feel less alone, and that more families will feel able to speak about vanishing twin syndrome without shame or stigma.
“There can be light ahead, even when it feels as though nothing, but bad luck has come your way. We share this story to help other families—and to honour the twin we lost, our Sunny.”
